food for thoughts

don’t break these guys, please!..

I always wonder that inspiration, strong enough to bring me to take a pen into my hand, can come from unexpected side suddenly and lie in wait in themes I never know I want to write about.

For example, I never thought I want to write a few kind words in support of teenage boy’s band.

But let me start from the very beginning.

Sometimes I go to the food market during the lunch break and very often I meet aged lady on my way at the same place, almost at the same time. At first, I just passed by, then I began to greet her and later we started to speak briefly. That was overcast and ordinary working day. I have to admit I go to my work without pleasure. I won’t go into this matter further, I just want to make it clear that I was, let’s say, in a grey mood. In short, I had nothing to say to her and I just smiled.

She smiled and asked me: “Why do you smile?”
I said: “I smile for you!”
She smiled again and said: “Like the sun?”

My smile grew wider, and I realized that her phrase has changed my day, because an ordinary day turned to a wonderful day. And I don’t even know her name.

So, I wanted to do something good. I wanted to do something good without any reason.

It happened that after the signing of the petitions on Urgency network and Care2 websites, I came across the information that the young boy’s band “One Direction” was booed while receiving the award at VMA. I know this information is completely different in content but I was curious, because when I was a schoolgirl, I was somewhat a fan of bands like Backstreet Boys and ‘NSYNC. So I listened to a few songs and now I can say this genre of music isn’t that I prefer. But!..

But I couldn’t figure out the reason why they had to be so humiliated.

Moreover I watched a few video where the guys visit Ghana with a charity mission. Honestly, I doubt my mind could cope with such a heavy burden at their age. And though their bodies are entirely dotted with tattoos, because of this charity mission I have a hope that they have the qualities to go through thick and thin with dignity.

Guys from One Direction visit GhanaBy the way, if you feel that you became hardened or forgot when you use your own humanity, that video will be a great and useful training.

I want to repeat I haven’t found any reason to hate these individual guys. On the contrary, it seems or rather I feel like these guys radiate the warm naive goodness. In such moments I don’t want them to grow up. When we mature, we learn to hide our tears when we are sad, we have to hide our own naivety and goodness, because for adult it’s like a visiting card of a weakling in the modern world. But it is precisely due to these things we are still able to find the beauty in the grey days and we shouldn’t be ashamed of our tears, because there are enough reasons for them.

So that’s why I wrote all of this: People do not let hatred come into your soul and do not break these guys, please!

P.S. I’ve always said that I believe in the word and I think so now. I know a good word can go a long way; there should always be a place and time for it.




people say they know you and don’t understand what you are saying..
people say they understand you and take offense at your advice..

people say they never hurt you and lie in your face..

people say they care about you and you spend too much time waiting for a call..
people say they love you and hit where it really hurt..

P.S. in quest of hand to hold.

illogical post..

Iscariot by Boyd Holbrook

Before I begin, I have to warn you that most likely this post may seem illogical.

It is amazing how things can call up old memories. Even completely unrelated things can affect the right thread of your mind, and you suddenly find yourself in a totally different time.

That happened with me when I saw installation “Iscariot” by Boyd Holbrook.

When I saw the things that are shown in the photo I thought about peace at first. I thought that it is possible to accept your own fate obediently. And after this I went back to the past, when one woman I knew said that my sister is smart and will definitely do a good career but happy marriage falls to my lot.

Honestly, I almost heard that I was called a fool. I was indignant at that, of course. I felt indignation inside of me so I made an effort to get out of the place that didn’t promise a good future for me and I moved to a more pleasant place, as it seemed at that moment, to prove that I can really do something too.

I won’t pursue further how my situation is getting on now, but success in career doesn’t give the pleasure which I expected.

I consider as main idea, after all seeing and deliberated, the following: what if we could meekly accept our own fate, so to speak, abandon all attempts to escape from cuddle of life and, without doubts, trust the Powers of High, so we can feel peace comparable to taking a bath full of soap bubbles?

I can’t imagine how far or close I’m to the plan of the author… And by the way, I warned you that this post will probably be illogical.

an empty chair..

«You need to think carefully before let someone into your soul. Because an empty chair is left after that person, if he suddenly leaves you. And over time, you can get lonely “theatre of the Soul”, where you are on stage, and not a single viewer is in the hall…»

These are not my words and yes, it sounds like a horoscope that doesn’t offer anything good. But, you must admit that, they are damn true!


Yesterday I found a note dated 05.04.12 with the following content: 

 “Today my nails are painted yellow (it’s absolutely not in my habit or style) and I put new boots, but I’m still former. Everything around me is difficult, and people seem to compete with each other, exposing their inner deformity, as though a tournament with incredibly valuable prize takes place hereabout”.

 Honestly I don’t remember what exactly happened then (my memory is a big puzzle for me), but the situation hasn’t changed much after three months…

 I really hope the better situation with human virtue develops somewhere in the world! 

How do you cope with misfortune, people?

I haven’t got so many anxious thoughts in my mind at this point, but they kick up a terrible fuss, making it difficult to find inspiration for writing new post, worthy to spend time on it.. both mine and of those who glance here…

It is a difficult time, some not very pleasant changes are happening at my work and my mother is beginning a serious struggle with a severe disease.

How do you cope with misfortune, people?!

For example, when I suffer from a stress (small or great, it doesn’t matter) I simply need to visit a book market. Honestly, I don’t have enough time to read all purchased books, because each book needs the right time and right mood…

This blog is not one of those where you can find advice or get positive emotions, now I’m inclined to identify it as an opportunity to “cry on somebody’s shoulder” without having to strain friends with my problems…

I just need somewhere to let my concerns…

P.S. my new conclusions:  We live in the time when kindness done by a stranger has a greater surprise then someone’s sudden trip…